As Zooey Deschanel said, "I'm a person who gets better with practice. Getting older is awesome because you get more practice." I can relate - big time. Here are 6 things I would tell my younger, doe-eyed, slightly immature, naive self.
So, you broke up huh? Man, that sucks. I feel for you, I really do. I'm not an expert on much but I do know a thing or two about rebuilding after a fall.
Three things: 1). I'm not here to man hate. I find men to be quite amazing actually. 2). I'm not going to lie to you, this is going to really, really suck. 3). The only way out, is through.
Broken hearts are rough. You feel it in your soul, a physical pain, among other things, but please hear me when I say that it gets better; these are simply the facts.
There's no how-to guide on mending a broken heart. Actually, there's quite a few but I'm not here to talk to you through sappy Pinterest quotes. I'm not going to tell you to put your big girl pants on or that there are plenty of fish in the sea. You will never hear me speak about seeking revenge or finding love at bar close. That talk is for the pigeons and to be frank, a waste of everyone's time.
It's important to know that this process is just that, a process. No one expects you to bulldoze through this. So please, show yourself some grace. Time will be your biggest frenemy as it drags on, but I promise it will play a big role in getting you over that finish line. I wish I could fast forward and show you how everything will turn out for the better, because as impossible as it seems, it most definitely will.
You're going to have good days and you're going to have really horrible days. Some days will be liberating. These days are like rare jewels, treasure them. On the good days I suggest dancing around your kitchen in your underwear to Ingrid Michaelson's "Time Machine" or buying a bottle of champagne and watching Eat. Pray. Love. a ridiculous number of times. Please enjoy these days– you deserve them. On the day you break down in aisle four between the sparkling water and Crystal Light, know that that's normal. Don't worry, you're not crazy. These highs and lows are there to remind you how incredibly human you are.
I understand that this break up may be the most painful thing you're dealing with right now, and I get it. But I bet if you did some soul searching you'd find, somewhere deep down, that although it's painful, it's needed. Something, somewhere along the way stopped working and that's OK. This break up is going to teach you things about yourself that you would have never learned otherwise. When you come out of this, you won't be the same person you were walking in. There's a method to the madness. It's quite beautiful, really.
What I'm finding to be true in life is that it all comes down to trust. I've experienced this first hand. When I seek God and trust Him fully, He opens and closes the doors he wants me to go through. Realizing this is a total game changer– it's a freeing feeling, one I hope you feel very soon.
I know your life feels like one big Taylor song right now; I know that the lump in your throat makes it hard to swallow, and I know that it's hard to stand tall when you feel like you took a shot to the kidney. But I also know that even though you might not see it today or tomorrow, one day you're going to look back and be absolutely awestruck by how every little, tiny, minuscule thing added up and brought you right where you've always wanted to be.
Trusting isn't always easy, but trust you must.
Take It From Me